What I wanna be...

 Ugh. 

Isn't it irritating? People keep asking you, what are ur plans for the future? What do you wanna be? What do you wanna do in life? I mean, jeez people, chillllll.

So this is for all who want to know. 

When I was five I wanted to be a dancer, and now I'm like, dance-er? What the heck does a dancer do? I mean, dance, duh. But where? How is one a dance-er for a living? I mean dance teacher, choreographer, I get, but dancer?  Then I was seven and I wanted to be an actor, gee, barbie really made an impact with the 'I can be anything I wanna be' stuff. I mean you can, but I could hardly read, you know? Ten and I wanted to be a scientist! Actually, that's good goals for a ten-year-old. My favorite chapter was 'FOOD', and it was also the most difficult. So see, 5th-grade science textbooks are really a challenge!

Now, I wanna do a lot of stuff, pursue writing, go to Harvard, meet RDJ! But that's not all I wanna be. Now seriously, don't expect me to say, I wanna be a good human being...I mean I do but this is not sponsored by your life skills teacher. 

I wanna see more, I wanna be stan for silly things, I wanna learn, I wanna explore.  I wanna stop existing and start living, I wanna (low-key, lol) jump over some ropes, I wanna swim in countless rivers, I wanna see broken buildings that are of great importance to the world. I do want to read more stories, but I want to live one too. I do want to meet people who rock, but I want to be one of them too. I want to keep running until I have the unearned confidence of a Kardashian to think that I can fly. 

Though even while exploring the world more, I want to remember how I feel now, I want to remember being 13 and aspiring about all of this, I want to remember writing this. Whatever I become, I still wanna solve pretend mysteries, I still wanna make a fort in the middle of a make-belief jungle with my sister, I still wanna sneak chocolates in my room, I still wanna stay up late on a school night.

I want to be with people I love and who love me, I want to remember my past and unfold my future, I learn from mistakes and have the guts to make some more. 

I want to stay, where my heart beats a little beat faster.